August 10, 2018: It’s my birthday. The Lord tells me to give up instagram, I argue with Him and put it off until August 21st.
August 21, 2019: It’s been one WHOLE year without my crutch; my emotional, social, and creative outlet. I’ve been forced to BE this last year. Forced to make meaningful relationships. Forced to stare Him straight in the face and let His fiery eyes burn away anything that stands in the way of His jealous love.
I’ve been called to carry something heavy, weighty. Something so full it cannot be described. I’m meant to carry His tangible presence, His beauty, His unwavering and passionate love.
Starting a few years ago, I started to take advantage of transitions in my life and ask the Lord how to “alter” my next year. It naturally happened on birthdays.
When I was 22, the Holy Spirit told me to give up Self Pity. That changed my worldview. I learned to value myself, to value my words, to know my authority. At 23, it was Instagram and all social media outlets. I couldn’t see my future when He told me to do that. My whole life was packed into my car, evacuating from a forest fire. I was rethinking the whole game. I couldn’t find a home, my friends were betraying me and I longed for His tender voice to lead me. I just couldn’t hear it past my Instagram feed. Being very active on Instagram, it silently fed my fears, fueled my hurts, and gave me an escape from real life. Worst of all, it numbed out his voice.
John 10:27 “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me”
(HIS SHEEP HEAR HIS VOICE) Without His voice, you can only function so well until you revert to orphan ways.. it was too easy to suddenly link up again with the poverty spirit.
I really procrastinated cutting off my social media usage; but on August 21st, I severed all ties. At first it was sad. People wouldn’t even mention me in their insta stories because they were “helping me.” I got left out of things. Some people forgot me. But then my eyes cleared. I saw things differently, I experienced things at a more present and deeper level. I could finally connect: with God, nature and people. ALL of my favorite things. I forgot my password and couldn’t log back in so now it was impossible to get back on. God really helped me out there! One of my friends called me and texted me because she was so proud of my choice and vowed to not forget me. We’re closer to this day because she chose me and I chose her!
I realized relationships were sweeter and better when we had nothing to prove to anyone. When it was just US.
Did I cheat? Yes. How, you might ask? I had access to a few other accounts, Facebook too. But that’s where His grace comes in like a flood, surrounding us and giving us perspective. I realized that my year of discipline was a giant setup for success. You see, my plan was to go to school the following year and God only knows how distracted I get.. so naturally He would lead me in some healthy disciplines to train me in the right way to go. He’s a genius. And He knows each of us so well. Never doubt His ways..
My word this year is RUN. My goal is to fix my eyes on him and go to his word for direction and affirmation. I go to school this year, for the first time in a while, and I can’t have anything standing in what God has called me to do. I would highly suggest chatting with Jesus about what you can give up or take on that would pull you in closer to his heart. Be encouraged, friends!
Hebrews 12:1-2 “Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking unto Jesus, the [a]author and [b]finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”