Good evening to all of my rad wild fashion loving glitter bombs.
I want to share something personal with you today about my journey, my personal style, and how I believe God celebrates our creative expression in our unique style.
I think it’s pretty safe to say since a very young age I’ve had a very unique personal style. Yes this is a photo of me wearing a boot AND a stiletto shoe because why not right?!!
When I was a child I honestly had the most bizarre style. I’d be dripping in jewellery, I’d wear bright coloured shoes and miss matching outfits and I wouldn’t think twice. My mum is an absolute legend for actually letting me out the house looking like that. I even remember sometimes getting strange looks from people when I was really little. Picking out random clothes to match how I was feeling was something that came naturally, and it was just me I suppose and it brought me so much joy and still does to this day.
I managed to keep my quirkiness going all the way through school and college up until this day, but at the impressionable age of 20 years old my child like approach to fashion got squashed by one comment from a christian (who I really looked up to at the time) and I can’t even remember what he said but it was something along the lines of ‘if you want to be a proper christian, you need to give up fashion because it’s not Godly’
“Oh” I thought, as I guilt and shame filled my heart.
“Does that mean God hates that part of my personality?”
“Is God annoyed with me for being passionate about fashion?”
“If that passion wasn’t from God, is it from somewhere else?”
“Does this mean I need to walk away from my creativity?”
As I look back on this little moment I realised that through this one little comment, I started to believe the lie that God rebuked creativity, fun, colour and personality.
I started going down a slipperly slope of legalism, religion, and conditional love.
I would feel immense guilt for wearing my quirky outfits, when I was having fun, when I rested and if I missed a bible reading, or made a mistake I would feel so ashamed and disconnected from God. I believed He only loved me when I was trying to be a good christian, and keeping to the rules, and totally trying to squash my personality. And I felt anything but free. I felt like a slave, trapped in chains. It sounds very dramatic but this is really how I felt. I thought to be a christian, you had to be boring. I thought God was mad. Mad at me for who I was. Mad at me for my desire to live out of the box.
My whole relationship with God was an absolute lifeless drag to say the least. I totally pied off my personality.
In midst of my striving some tricky life situations accured and suddenly I didn’t have the strength anymore to put on a performance before God. My first response was ‘Screw this. I need a pack of cigarettes’ and the following weekend I called some girlfriends and we hit up the clubs and I fully intended on getting drunk out my mind to drown my sorrows.
Little did I know that on this evening I was about to have a life changing encounter that was going to totally change who I thought God was…. in a TOILET!
I was in the club with my friends and I was starting to get a little tipsy.. I needed to pee so I went off to the toilet and I sat down in the cubicle and I felt God’s presence fill up that space. I felt immense love and kindness, I felt God’s smile over me. His kindness overwhelmed me and it was the purest, most genuine love I’ve ever experienced in my entire life. And I heard Holy Spirit say “daughter, this is not the way for you” and when I felt God say this, I felt no judgement whatsoever, He totally met me where I was at. In my mess and chaos. I learned for the first time that God was kind.
God started to take me on a freedom journey, and revealed to me who He was as a father. I started to ponder on Matthew 5:48 where God is described as ‘the perfect father’ .. what did a perfect father look like to me? To me the perfect father would have great banter, he would be cheerful and playful, he would celebrate his kids victories and passions, he would want to spend time with me and get to know me, I could trust him, he would provide, he would protect, and I would know no matter what happened I would be loved by him. To be honest, this is actually what my earthly dad IS like and so many more things – and it suddenly dawned on me that my dad, and all the other legend dads I knew were made in the image of God. All of these wonderful attributes were placed in these fathers by God Himself and on top of that God was even MORE great that the best father on earth you could meet.
The more I started to actually have a personal relationship with God where the pressure was off, the more I got to know Abba Father. I started to fall so in love with God. And it got to the point where if I didn’t spend time in God’s presence I would feel like I was suffocating. And through a series of encounters with the Holy Spirit, and studying the word of God I started to feel like I was coming back to life, I started to dream again and best of all, a wild love and freedom started to flow from my relationship with God that gave me permission to totally be myself. And now I pick out my clothes to express the what I feel inside and even if it’s a rainy day if I feel like it I will put some glitter on my eyes with some bright liner and whacky trousers. I want to celebrate the freedom I get to live in through Christ and one way I want to express that is through fashion.
John 10.10 says that Christ has come to give us ABUNDANT LIFE! This is anything but boring! This is adventure, joy, wonder and so many other things.
So do you know my conviction is now about who God is?
I believe the things that are important to you are important to God.
I believe that you are completely unconditionally loved.
I believe that fun, laughter, celebration, art and creativity was God’s idea.
I believe that we are wild and free just like our Heavenly Father
I believe that we are created to create. Whether thats through drama, dance, art, make up poetry, fashion, film, you name it. God loves it.
I believe that were the spirit of the Lord is there is freedom.
I believe God gave you your personality.
I believe the things you are passionate about are for a very special reason.
I believe God is excited about your life.
I believe you are a God dream.
I love picking out what I’m going to wear for the day. It’s one of the ways I express myself (as you have probably gathered) 😉
I love meeting people who have their own little style going on. I love it when people get creative with clothes, jewellery, accessories, nail varnish, make up and hair styles. I love getting inspired by other people’s outfits. I love it when I see someone wearing something totally WHACK and they have no care in the world because they like it. It doesn’t even occur to them what someone else might think.
If you want to wear those crazy neon yellow trousers do it. If you want to wear a green wig do it. If you want to dress like a punk do it. If you want to wear a nike tracksuit do it. If you want to dress like a rock star do it. If you want to dress gothic do it. If you want to miss match your clothes do it. If you want to wear something out of the box please DO IT.
Create your own unique modest colourful wonderful style that suits YOU and you only. Don’t conform to the world. Don’t follow everybody else. When you are totally yourself you inspire others to do the same. The more you express your creative side that maybe you’re worried about the world seeing the more true you will feel to yourself. The more confident you will feel. The more you will love your life. Maybe people won’t accept you being different to everyone else but I think that says more about them than it does about you.
So add some whack and colour to your life. Don’t hold on to comments and opinions.